“How Can I book you?”
"What do you sound like? What kind of music do you play?"
What kind of music do I play? Good Music, Acoustic Music, Mostly Original Music. Occasionally unique twists on cover songs. Insensitive Folk Music. Irreverent Gospel Music. Humor with a groove. I have tested positive for the Bluegrass as well as Americana, Blues, Country, Country-Blues, and Honky-Tonk. Basically all the different roots music stylings.
“Are your shows FAMILY FRIENDLY?“
Yes. No. It Depends.
Whose family are we talking about?
I was in the Navy for 20 years (1980-2000). Like most Veterans, I have a dark, warped, sense of humor. I know all of those bad words and then some and I am skilled in their usage. I could probably make a carnival worker blush if I were to set my mind to it. However, you should be aware that I can play a Baptist/Family Friendly show. I do it all the time. it is not my desire to intentionally offend anyone, or to make anyone feel uncomfortable. I want everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, regardless of age, sex, gender, skin color, national origin, politics, or religion, to feel welcome at my shows.
You should however probably be aware that many of my songs contain adult themes and subject matter such as death, addiction, suicide, screwing up, marriage, love, erectile dysfunction, the joys of getting old, and even shark attack. These may be topics which you may be not quite ready to discuss with your children yet. But then again, your kids are gonna learn about this shit someday, and if you are worried about the language they might hear, why are you bringing the little shits into a bar in the first place?
I’m pretty good at reading an audience and I am intelligent enough to usually know what is appropriate and what isn’t. I keep an eye out for the presence of children. but as you can tell from watching some of the videos, I have been known to drop the occasional curse word. I might occasionally be profane, but never vulgar. I have a couple of Presbyterian Ministers who are fans (and friends). I usually do a good job of keeping my mouth in check. I won’t be singing “Erectile Dysfunction Blues” or “You Can’t Trust a Fart” at your Church Service, and yes, I’m willing to play at your Church Service. In fact, my song “New Wayfaring Strangers” was used as the basis for a Sunday Sermon once.
Will you play at my…?
Yes, I will play at your Bar, in your Restaurant, in your Back Yard, in your Living Room, in your Bedroom, in your Kitchen, in your Den, in your Den of Inequity, at your Clothing Optional Fried Chicken Restaurant, at your Frat Party, at your Pool Party, at your Chicken Stew or Pig Pickin’, at your child’s birthday party, at your Mama’s birthday party, at Baby Jesus’s birthday party, your Birthday party while everyone is wearing their birthday suit, at your Gay Pride party, at your Leather/Bear party, at your Engagement party, at your Wedding, at your Divorce, at your Baby Shower, at your Vasectomy Celebration, at your Tea Party, at your Church Social, even at your Funeral.
I won’t however play for assholes. If you, your group, club, organization, etc practices/preaches intolerance of any kind, you are going to need to find someone else. None of my pillowcases have eyeholes.
Yes. I will play most anywhere you want just as long as you are willing to pay me to do so... and you aren’t a complete and total dick. Partial dicks are determined on a case by case basis.
“WHAT DO YOU CHARGE?”
How much you got?
My Standard rates are:
2 hr $150
3 hr $200
This is for local and semi-local gigs within 100 miles or so of Winston-Salem, NC. This includes Me, and a sound system adequate to cover a small to medium size venue. If you need a Duo, add a $100 to those rates.
If there is significant travel, weirdness, or I have to deal with some pain in the ass requirement such as having to sleep in a tent, No songs in the key of Bb, I have to perform naked while wearing only cowboy boots, a cape, and a Nixon mask, I’m charging you more. If I have to let your drunkass sister-in-law who thinks she can sing when she can’t, sit in and play Wagon WHeel on a Kazoo it’s gonna cost you a lot more.
“We don’t have a budget for live music…” “WILL YOU PLAY FOR EXPOSURE?…”
”Will you PLAY for tips?…”
”Will you play for the door?…”
Here’s the deal. I have expenses. I have to pay for gas, maintenance on my vehicle, strings, picks, tuners, and cables. I have to pay for guitars and guitar maintenance. I have to set time aside to write these songs and rehearse/practice. I spend a LOT of time booking, watching eBay, PornHub, etc.
I prefer a minimal guarantee.
Do you sell beer for tips? Do you accept tips to pay for a four course dinner? Will Duke Power accept “exposure” as payment for electricity? This is my business and I try to run it as such, just like you do your business. That being said, I am a dumbass who will often play most anywhere once. Shoot me an email, we’ll talk.
“We are interested in you playing for us, but we require all performers to audition via our open mic... If we like you, we will book you.”
Sure, I’m good with that, but first how about you drive to my house and bring me a couple of burgers, some banana pudding, and a couple of cold beverages? If I like it, I might pay you for it next time, and it might even lead to possible future business.
I’ve actually been told this Open Mike Audition thing numerous timesNo. Not just no, but Hell No. There is enough video and audio on this website, and on YouTube, and elsewhere, for you to be able to get some idea of what to expect. You can look at the calendar and call the other venues that I regularly play and ask them what to expect.